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I can't do this.
One false move and they'll follow me home again;
they'll swallow me whole again.

How forgiving of things I did
when I watered them down for you and I
moved them around for you.

Moving out's in the back of our minds.
Double thought, win/loss at the same time.
Set an alarm for a month from today,
put it off, and turn off the light.

Didn't say goodnight.

They said "he must be so talented,
"all these balancing acts,"
while my tightrope got tighter and straight jacket fell to the floor.

We're so charming when arms are so free,
I just hang from your door while you're
drifting off silently.

I was ripping you off,
I was wishing you'd cut my out violently,
I'd have a hand.
Are we less charming with no legs to stand?

I probably don't want to know.

Lost another family, looking for a center to
what you know.
Nothing lasts forever, this might be the year that we
go back home.
Burning wicks at both ends and seeing there's a dead for
what I know.
Held to broken promises, needing something honest to
go back home.

Months away, I'll return with a rose and a song,
still holding on.
Meet your new friend, your invite came to me like a dove,
but it's bloody tonight;
the light isn't right.
I'm a record broken babbling,
his likeness there is staggering,
this man in my place
holding tight to the back of you and
I watch you from the shadows
as you say goodbye to me
and hello to him.

I just can't believe
this is what I need
so I could realize I'm
the reason this is happening.

This is war!
This is war, that's what they want you to think.
Nothing left here but a bullet in an oil tank
Hella fried, hella gone, off the way you move across me,
move across me.

Turn it off!
No shit, I've lived in some ugly places:
dark bodies chain linked to brilliant faces.
Proud Mary, God Mode, I don't got no patience,
right when you're woke, hit you with them slave ships.

But if I could be your ghost...
If I could be your ghost, right now...

Take me away, back there to the hole where the city goes
Back down in the hole where the city goes
Back down in the hole where the silence grows
Back down in the hole where the city goes...

I don't want to know.


from Balancing Acts, released July 20, 2018


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