bummer vacation

by summerbruise

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released January 1, 2017

mike - guitar/bass/vocals
castle - drums/vocals

recorded & mixed by wasim's gear and collectibles in michigan


all rights reserved



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Track Name: caveman
when i can travel through time
i won't bother going backwards to when things were better
i'll just fast forward to the end of the world
so that i can be sure i'm the only one you've got left

or i suppose i could go to ancient rome
and say the right things to get fed to the lions
or kill some important emperor
so you'd read about me at cornell or whatever

maybe i'd go to the stone age
where i'd be too hungry to worry and wonder where you are
or what yr thinkin
i'd just hunt and i'd gather and i'd know no different

but i know one thing for sure
i will avoid the future like the plague
but that's nothing new -- i want nothing new

what bothers me the most is
before i thought to stop a plane crash or cure some disease
i thought of you -- and what i could do

really i'd go to any time, not just to find some clever way to die
but to know that i wasn't right here and right now
so the odds would increase that maybe you'd be there too
Track Name: bash at the beach ('98)
i want my money back, every cent that i've spent
every goddamn dollar and dime
i used to want all these things that i've got,
but now i've changed my mind
so back up the truck
you can have as much as you want,
just cut me a check
as long as when you're done there's nothing left

lately i've been living like the candle is lit at both ends
stepping on all the cracks that i can
(when i'm not being carried by friends)
they'll ask me why and i just reply "i guess for efficiency's sake"
but really, it's just more fun this way

this year was a freight train in a china shop
with boarded windows and doors
and i was a scam artist that picked up the shards
and tried to sell them for more
to any poor sap who still hadn't had the misfortune to meet me before
so i could buy more liquor
'cause i hardly know her anymore

you never liked the way that i looked
& i hate that you couldn't admit it
so i tried in his clothes to see if they'd fit
to no one's surprise, they didn't
and i have to say:
i'm pretty ashamed of the ways that i found to compensate

i just wanted to feel attractive today

i'm not an extrovert; i'm a parasite
i don't crave company; i need it
devour my friends inside and out
replace nothing after i eat it
i'm ready and willing to be okay
so why do you have to make me wait?
i saw your new picture today

this year was a freight train
and you were the ropes that bonded me to the track
while the new guy stood by silent black & white,
twirled his mustache as he laughed
at the poor sap who still hadn't had the closure he was promised
but that's okay, i guess i can wait
maybe next year you can be honest
Track Name: well, at least i'm not vaping
well, i wish that i could say
i've rebelled some other way
than something that'll kill my mom someday

but instead i line my lungs with tar
& imagine what you'd say
with spiteful satisfaction i take one more breath away

i saw you cry the day you found that coupon in the mail
it was addressed to your brother,
advertising some brand of cigarettes

i watched your heart break as you pictured his covered in sludge
& held you while you asked me why and how he could do that to himself
and you
and your mom
after he saw what it did to hers
i didn't have an answer then -- i was just as lost as you were

now here i am asking myself the exact same fucking thing
it's so hard to see the consequences
you made it hard to see anything

another bum, another drag, another guilty cough
i'll take myself away from you
instead of just taking off (like you)
no, i'll do it brick by brick, breath by breath
or lack thereof

i know you won't forgive me for this
i know that shouldn't help
but it does
Track Name: pleonasm
mary and my gut both tell me:
leave well enough alone
but i just don't see how well enough could be alone
so i call you from the couch
there's some stuff i wanna talk about

i pry open my mouth but what comes out
was nothing that i meant to say -- just everything i ate that day
'cause the best laid plans of drunk and anxious
often stop at getting drunk and anxious
you know i'm no good at making plans

wouldn't even be here if i didn't think you'd be
i'd love to want to hide but i survive by being seen
if only things were half as easy as you made them seem
i'd worry less what feels the best and do what's best for me

i don't sleep much anymore
but i'm pretending more than ever
Track Name: teeth (not the movie)
nothing's ever really no one's fault
and i can tell by the face you made
when you tried to say that was the case
that you just knew i already felt like shit
and if we both know who's to blame for this then
what's the point in either of us saying it?

i thought chewing gum would help me stop grinding my teeth
but now i've just got even more energy
to grind the ones the gum doesn't reach

yesterday was better than the day before
but today didn't make it off the bedroom floor
it turns out getting better was more like the eye of the storm
or worse, it might have been the calm before

these things come and go, or at least that's what they say
but i'm starting to have my doubts
'cause it really seems like mine are here to stay

still some days i have to take the longer way to work
i'm always late but that's just the price i pay

and even when she lets me stay the night
my nightmares stay the same
i guess some things really never change

the clouds don't go away -- they just turn into rain,
evaporate and come back another day
Track Name: happy hour
it's one thing to create a monster
but you made the mistake of leaving one for dead
and if you read frankenstein in high school,
i'm afraid you and i both know how this one's gonna end
or at least what happens next

i'm crawling toward h street
eating candy that a stranger gave to me
lost some friends, made some more, threw up on the red line
tonight i am a monument
a real sight to see

back home things are back to normal,
but it's still that stupid kind of normal
that involves me waking up on my boss's bathroom floor
well, i don't like my bed much anymore

the old pictures of us don't even bum me out these days
because i hate the old both of us
it's all these new pictures of you
who seemingly wants nothing to do with me

for now i'll poke the bear when i show up here and there
force you to ignore me instead of letting you forget me
run into your friends and i'll recite what i've rehearsed
say 'i'm fine' in just the way that says i'm not

hoping that they might relay that back to you
on the off chance that maybe just for once
you might be not fine too

why is this so easy for you?

i guess nothing's gonna change your mind
it seems like nothing's gonna change your mind
well if nothing's gonna change you mind
i wish something could at least change mine
Track Name: rachel
i don't remember much --
i've got you to thank for that
too drunk to close the door
and in the morning all our friends laughed
but you just brushed them off

you're pretty good at that

you can have my last adderall
it's probably the last thing i need
if my car's gone in the morning
then i guess i'll never leave

i'll feed the cats & do the dishes
& pick you up from class
or spend all day locked in your bedroom
counting circles on your ceiling
waiting for you to come back

you don't have to come back

you can blame it all on me
and my unrelenting tendency
to seek out everything but what i need
but if you do then i'm entitled to appreciate the irony
that it turns out all i needed all along
was to find someone who didn't need me

i'm so glad you don't need me