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It Turns Out There Aren't Many Perks of Being a Wallflower

from The Suburbs Have Ruined My Life by Proper

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lyrics

Everyone’s too sad or too sick
Or they just don’t give a shit about whose playing tonight in Kansas City
Unless it’s on 103, The Buzz, or some DIY basement sludge
And that, well that’s when it hit me
I don’t have any real friends
All I’ve got are these acquaintances
And none of them could care less
And somehow I’ve been okay with it
Until now

I went to the Tiny Moving Parts show last night
And I swear that it changed my life
And the entire concept of friendship to me
Like how we should hang out outside of work to do more than get fucked up and party
Because when I left a small town for the city
I thought something big would change within
And I’d be the everyman of this town
But what I was thinking
Going from a branch on a well rooted tree
To a grain of sand on the biggest beach
Where no one’s sure if they’re leaving or sticking around
Will you stick around?

And everyone I know is listening to Skrillex and Waka Flocka Flame
In fact the only records they actually own are Mumford & Sons, Odd Future, and Lil Wayne
They’re rather blow their money in Westport on molly and weed
Than go see a movie or go to the aquarium with me
And I just-

Well wait a second
What if I’ve been blowing people off like that too?
What if someone’s really needed my support or just wanted to spend time with me?
You know, it’s funny. I write so many songs about all these assholes I know
But I never stop to think about why I know so many
Maybe I should spend more time trying to meet other artists
Instead of trying to get the wrong people to like me

I went to the Tiny Moving Parts show last week
And I guess that I didn’t learn a god damn thing
I spent the last 12 years just taking whoever came to me
But now I see that it’s a 2 way street

Last month I left the Tiny Moving Parts show without a doubt
That I had everything all figured out
It turns out that we accept the love we think we deserve
But we deserve so much more
I just want to make friends
And build some lasting relationships
Because a military life fucked that up for me
And it turns out there aren’t many perks of being a wallflower
Or letting other people and liquor take the lead

We’ve gotta speak for ourselves
Because we get too comfortable
Doing these things we’ve always done with people that we don’t actually know
And I want to make friends
And build some lasting relationships
Being a wallflower isn’t working out for me

And I accept that I’m that grain of sand along the beach
And there’s no reason to be so terrified of the sea
I will let it take me
And whatever will be, will be
Yeah, whatever will be, will be
We will be

credits

from The Suburbs Have Ruined My Life, released January 31, 2018

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